The Centre

Legend tells of a not so mythical place in the bowels of a dusty, one bit, no horse town called Kampala, of a place so treacherous, so vile and degrading it sucks the joy out of anyone that goes there. Much like procrastination, this place is a thief of time, nay, a murderer of it. The learned have daubed it "The Centre" and speak of it in hushed tones. Those that do not know of its true nature refer to it simply as the Law Development Centre.

Established in the early seventies, it remains the last visage of torture enacted by the late President for Life, Field Marshal Alhaji Dr. Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, CBE. It fronts itself as a respectable institution to which lawyers go to study for and sit the bar exam before becoming fully fledged advocates of the High Court and subordinate courts there under.

It's true purpose is however far more sinister. Some would have you believe that any collection of lawyers is a bad sign. And this place takes a lump-some every year and purports to churn out advocates on the other end. The oness that make it out are usually scared for life. Not quite PTSD but close enough. And then there are the victims. Piles upon piles of failed lawyers, now unable to fend for themselves because the Centre did not deem them worthy.

Ample warning is often given to the martyrs before they offer themselves to the beast as fodder, usually by way of a Pre-Entry examination. It is a four hour long paper for which 50% is guaranteed to grant you access to your doom should you be foolhardy enough to sit it. The grueling exercise is only made worse by the wait for results which are usually received with mixed awe. 3/4's of the applicants are spared this fate. 

I was not. And thus begins the path of enlightenment. I shall chronicle my adventure through this torturous land for the next year. In dismal hope of bringing enlightenment to those that still wish to tread where Angels fear to go. The very concept of God is lost in this place. The rewards are of course substantial but the path is wrought with tears and betrayal. All the makings of a good telenovela.

I volunteer as tribute. And may the odds be forever in my favour.